// I HAVE TO ADMIT IT’S GETTING BETTER

Just because I spent a couple of months lying to myself does not mean, in any shape or form, that I plan to lie to the internet.

And so now, the truth as you’ve never seen it before:

I have been unhappy.

Not the Empty Soul sort of unhappy, nor an Ebenezer Scrooge sort of unhappy — perhaps it is better described as a mild unhappiness, the type that only really tickles at your mood, yet is still there. I wasn’t suffering from depression or anything and I didn’t have a major trauma in my life, I just knew that I wasn’t feeling the best I could feel.

But now, I am happy. Things are truly getting better.

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It’s weird, I guess, that for the better part of this year I could so easily identify as the opposite, but in the last few weeks I am able to live my day with a beaming smile, a giggle at the smallest things, and a victorious cry dancing upon my lips, “I am happy.”

To me, this change happened from two things. The first one of these was setting goals. I gave myself things that I wanted to achieve, and I actually worked tirelessly to make sure they came true. It sounds so cliché, when you put it like that, but putting your mind to something genuinely can make anything happen. One of these goals was to become school captain. I’m not the most popular of students at my school and I don’t play sport. To run for school captain, I was up against two other girls for the female position, one of which is practically a perfect human being. Nonetheless, I spent hours focusing on my speech prior to presenting it to both the teachers and the students. And in the end, I got it. I am 2017 female school captain for my school. And it feels damn good.

Anybody who knows me also knows I set the goal to be with the “boy of my dreams” (he’s really not that, just a lanky year 12 drama student with a penchant for outdated sunglasses and foreign films). He had no idea who I was, and most people were under the assumption he was gay. Fast forward a couple of months, and he has asked me to be his date to his graduation. Take that, society! He makes me feel so happy. Note: I’m not saying if you set the goal to yourself to be with your crush, it will happen. In life, sometimes the people we fall for don’t fall back, but rather stay rooted on the ground. Which is cool, too! You’ll find someone.

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The other thing I did was try to spread as much positivity in my life as possible. I’ve been trying my hardest to compliment others, help others, and be there for them when they need it.  A smile can go a very long way. I’ve never been one to believe in karma, but the fact that I have been so happy as a result of this simple, non-materialistic thing is really something I’d encourage everybody to do in their lives.

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These days, I really have been so happy. I know, dear reader, that to you, I’m purely a sixteen-year-old from Australia who tends to ramble and pretend she knows about the real world when, in fact, her biggest struggle is Netflix removing Jersey Boys or Shapes changing their recipe, but please, if you take anything from my mess of a post today, it’s this: set yourself goals, and be happy along the way. 

 

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